Tokyo Drift

[K3 Chris Onwiler]

Matinee showing means that's $4.50 I'll never see again.  A slew of slutty asian tang and dozens of shiny sportscars weren't enough to save this one.  F&F1 was just cool enough to excuse it's sillyness.  F&F2 blew steaming chunks.  This third one makes the second one look like Citizen Kane!   At least I got to sit in the air conditioning for two hours.
I think I've figured out why Highside will probably never be a financial success.  It doesn't suck NEARLY enough.  How much do you want to bet that Tokyo Drift outearns World's Fastest Indian in about the first two weeks?
What's that saying about how you'll never lose money underestimating the taste of the American public?

[Team-G]

slutty asian tang....

There's the porn take-off name, 'Drifty Asian Tang...'
kinda like "Shaving Ryan's Privates...'

[Woofentino Pugrossi]

There's the porn take-off kinda like "Shaving Ryan's Privates...'

Sad thing is, there probably is a movie called that.



But anyone wanna take bets on how soon some kid kills himself or someone else tying to do that crap in the streets?

[spyderchick]

The porn version is "Saving Ryan's Privates" 

The acting was Baaaaaadddddd. And not in a good way. The only redeeming thing about this movie was that cars were trick, and the stunt drivers could drive. As far as hot chickie lead, she was nice, but had so obviously never driven a car at speed through a turn. I mean seriously, fully looking at your passenger, drifting a mountian road while casually tweaking the wheel. Oh yeah, she had been there.

Edit: Just read Eberts review on this film, and he actually liked it.  There's a final scene where DKs mafia uncle walks slowly toward the group at the end, and I leaned over to Roger and whispered,  "Do you get cell reception out here?" because it reminded me of the funny Verizion commercial with the shady thug. Ebert must not watch any TV. 

[Woofentino Pugrossi]

Eberts an idiot. Plain and simple. Jon Lovitz's cartoon character Jay Sherman from "The Critic" has move insight to movies than Ebert does.

[K3 Chris Onwiler]

They're in Tokyo, right?  There are at least half a dozen fight scenes, right?  And not one Japanese dude used any martial arts?
Cars bounce off each other and everything else in sight, but rarely sustain damage.
The American boy lead character doesn't speak Japanese, but he's only confused for a minute, then everyone else just switches to English....
The most interesting girl in the movie (to me at least) was the chick mechanic, but she didn't have a single line!
A 66 Shelby drift car with a turbo jap motor?
Oh, I could go on all day....

[spyderchick]

Oh, no, no, no! My Fav scene  was the one on the roof where Hahn spews some schlock bull hockey about his philosophy on life. All in the most highschool drama soliliquy type delivery.

Hey, this movie was actually mpore entertaining than I originally thought. We can discuss the crappiness of it endlessly!  Woohoo!

[Team-G]

So it should be available on DVD in, when, about a week?  Good!  I need some insomnia relief 

[dylanfan53]

The porn version is "Saving Ryan's Privates" 

The acting was Baaaaaadddddd. And not in a good way.

Eesh...and you know this how??  

[msbrit1]

I own Saving Ryan's Privates....Just Kidding.  I've seen it advertised on pop ups though...

[spyderchick]

Eesh...and you know this how??   

Now this is just the kind of thing that causes flame wars and ruins the interweb!

[cardzilla]

Just goes to show, it's not about making a good movie, it's about getting your ass in the seat... mission accomplished.

The fist one is a cult classic and they milked that twice now... the cow is dry.