We've taken our share of abuse....
Now it's time to dish a little back to the boys. ;D
Top Ten Reasons Why Cats Are Better Than Men!
1. Cats don't golf every Saturday.
2. Cats won't say an outfit makes you look fat.
3. Cats aren't interested in microbrews. (what is that anyway?)
4. Cats don't golf on Sunday either.
5. Cats treat your mom with respect.
6. Cats don't leave the seat up.
7. Cats aren't afraid of commitment.
8. Cats don't think the Three Stooges are funny.
9. Cats don't need constant attention.
10. Cats don't worry about hair loss.
But the top reason cats are better than men...............
Cats can be neutered if they stray!
catastrophes
Why cats are better than Men
Cats keep their opinions to themselves.
Cats don't criticize your mother.
Cats never question how much you're eating.
Cats never claim they know how to fix larger appliances.
Cats understand the importance of beauty sleep.
Cats are happy to let you drive.
Cats always look good first thing in the morning.
One good purr can be worth a thousand words.
Cats don't complain when you get a short haircut.
Cats love it when you go shopping.
Cats never return the gifts you get them.
Cats are able to keep the romance alive.
You can let a cat out at night and it always comes back.
Cats are never late for dinner.
You can put a name tag on a cat if it shows signs of wandering.
Cats keep your feet warm.
Cats are furry things that are nice to look at.
Cats don't have a Mother-In-Law.
Cats lick their own private parts.
The only bottle cats hit is the milk.
A cat always hits the litter box.
Better chance of training a cat.
No matter what your cat drags into your house, you don't have to pretend you like it.
You never have to spend time with your cat's mother.
If you ask enough times, a cat may actually listen to you.
A cat purrs when you serve him dinner.
It's okay if a cat rubs up against your best friend.
You don't have to worry about your cat turning into a pig when you host a party.
A cat knows you're the key to his happiness... a man thinks he is.
If a cat jumps into your lap, a little light petting will satisfy him.
WHY DOGS ARE BETTER THAN MEN
Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public.
Dogs miss you when you're gone.
You never wonder whether your dog is good enough for you.
Dogs feel guilt when they've done something wrong.
Dogs don't brag about whom they have slept with.
Dogs don't criticize your friends.
Dogs admit when they're jealous.
Dogs do not play games with you -- except fetch (and then never laugh at how you throw).
Dogs are happy with any video you choose to rent, because they know the most important thing is that you're together.
Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.
You can train a dog.
Dogs are already in touch with their inner puppies.
You are never suspicious of your dog's dreams.
Gorgeous dogs don't know they're gorgeous.
The worst social disease you can get from dogs is fleas. (OK, the *really* worst disease you can get from them is rabies, but there's a vaccine for it, and you get to kill the one that gives it to you.)
Dogs understand what "no" means.
Dogs don't need therapy to undo their bad socialization.
Dogs don't make a practice of killing their own species.
Dogs understand if some of their friends cannot come inside.
Dogs think you are a culinary genius.
You can house train a dog.
You can force a dog to take a bath.
Dogs don't correct your stories.
Middle-aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner.
Dogs aren't threatened by a woman with short hair.
Dogs aren't threatened by two women with short hair.
Dogs don't mind if you do all the driving.
Dogs don't step on the imaginary brake.
Dogs admit it when they're lost.
Dogs don't weigh down your purse with their stuff.
Dogs do not care whether you shave your legs.
Dogs take care of their own needs.
Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do.
Dogs mean it when they kiss you.
Dogs are nice to your relatives.
Yup, I could learn alot from a dog. Next time Aunt Irene turns her back I'll jump right up and try and have my way with her! ;D
And the next time I get constipated you should feel proud as I drag my butt all around the yard ;D
Anyone who thinks a man doesn't listen needs to get a cat!
QuoteAnyone who thinks a man doesn't listen needs to get a cat!
Why do you think I call Paul a big dog? ;D
;)
I always thought dogs were better cuz they can lick themselves ::)
Tho women's faults may be many,
Men have only two:
Everything they say, and
Everything they do.
QuoteTho women's faults may be many,
Men have only two:
Everything they say, and
Everything they do.
Hey do you need a new boyfriend? I think I can live up to these expectations!!! Just ask my ex-wife! ;D
:P
Yup, nothing quite like it gets when everything you do is annoying them. I went to a counselor with my ex, and she told him:
"Well, it's just that everything he does is annoying to me. For example, his breathing: In and out, in and out...it just never stops!" ;D
OK, lets take this apart one line at a time:
1. Dont golf either...sorry.
2. It's your fat ass that makes the outfit look fat, not the outfits fault!
3. I am interested in all brews! I hold no prejudice when it comes to cervezas!
4. Once again, don't golf.
5. I treat my mom with respect!
6. If we can pu the seat up, you can put it down!
7. I am not afraid of commitment. I have commited to 5 different motorcycles, a mortgage and a couple of cars!
8. Sorry, never liked the 3 stooges. We really didn't get to watch them where I am from.
9. Neither do we. Women on the other hand...
10. Hair loss? Why worry? I can always borrow that rug from the guy in Jef4y's avatar! Look how happy he is!
11. I will leave that one alone!
QuoteNow it's time to dish a little back to the boys. ;D
Top Ten Reasons Why Cats Are Better Than Men!
1. Cats don't golf every Saturday.
2. Cats won't say an outfit makes you look fat.
3. Cats aren't interested in microbrews. (what is that anyway?)
4. Cats don't golf on Sunday either.
5. Cats treat your mom with respect.
6. Cats don't leave the seat up.
7. Cats aren't afraid of commitment.
8. Cats don't think the Three Stooges are funny.
9. Cats don't need constant attention.
10. Cats don't worry about hair loss.
But the top reason cats are better than men...............
Cats can be neutered if they stray!
Till...
Women can walk around, Short, Bald and Fat...
And still thinking they are seXy...
They will never match up ;D
XIII